Is Real Romance Dead In Nigeria?

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I was having lunch with the girls the other day and all of a sudden this topic came up – Why are Nigerian men not romantic? This got me wondering.
To begin, I ask : is this actually true? Are most Nigerian men unromantic? Are they just there to provide and sleep with?


I asked google for the dictionary meaning of the word ROMANCE. This is what I got.


Most women believe romanctic people are the ones who believe in the ideal love they see on television. Those people are usually obsessed with romantic movies, songs and they dream of finding a romantic partner or hoping their present partners could be like.
They believe that these people usually are the ones who fall in love at first sight and they are the ones who get disappointed the most when their partner forgets something as simple as their birthday date which may I add is a very big deal. Let me break things down into 2 main parts.


1. Kinds of Romance:

You see, when it comes to romance there are two types of people in this world, I call them the romantic ones and the bargain hunters and being able to determine to which category your partner belongs to will help you understand his behavior better.

Bargain hunters

Bargain hunters are way different than romantic ones, they don’t look for romantic love as much as they look for a bargain. They think about love with their minds and their decision is 100% based on pure logic.


While the reasoning for a romantic person would be “I love him” the reasoning for a bargain hunter would be “She/he looks good and we have some common interests, that would help our life go better.”

Bargain hunters look for potential partners the way they look for a car or a gadget. Once they find the things they are looking for they decide to get into a relationship even if they don’t have intense emotions. That is a relationship based on sexuality or finance. Plain and simple.

In Nigeria, what we have primarily is Romantics meeting Bargain hunters and when that happens,the end result is heart-break.

 Romantics+Bargain Hunters = Heart-break

On the other hand, you may have guessed the type of problems that could arise when a romantic woman meets a bargain hunter man.
While she would be focusing on spending romantic time with him the man would be focused on the practical aspects of his relationship and vice-versa. The key to a successful relationship is understanding your partner and knowing the category that he belongs to so you can have tolerance for his behavior. If you indeed love him.


The Essence Of Romance:

Another basic truth is men are moved by what they SEE and women are moved by what they HEAR. A man will respond faster to a woman with a massive bum and and over spilling cleavage than how he would with a woman covered up. Women nowadays respond more to wealth that actually getting to know the character of the subject. These things will never change.

You need to focus more on getting to meet a person more than what you want to get out of a person.
Who is to the blame?

There is this never ending battle between the sexes tagged WHO STARTED IT? Women will give you frightening stories of how they were dumped for a younger looking woman and how they swore to get revenge on every piece of p**is on this earth. Men on the other hand would tell you how women would do anything for money. The trend goes on in a never-ending circle.

From my perspective, I really don’t think Nigerian men are unromantic, I just feel they don’t see why should bother being. 
Most men in a relationship (women too) get bored before long and tend to seek for the next thrill. Hence they cheat.

Another thing I want to put out is that romance in a relationship has to be mutual and not based on gifts because women majorly base the level of their spouses love on how much is SPENT on them. That is the naked truth.

To be continued in part 2..

1 Comment
  1. Anonymous says

    If I hear!! Eehh Moji? Shebi na Romance I go chop abii? U try…

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