Inside every woman is a sexual beast just waiting to break free. I truly believe that. So chances are, if you haven’t seen her wilder side, the issue lies with you. You need to be willing to do anything to get it out.
For most women, there are even several methods to extract her freaky side but it’s your job to diligently try them all to find out which. Does sex talks leave a her feeling uncomfortable? Maybe character playing is more her style. Maybe she has a thing for spankings. It’s your job to figure out what her flavor of choice is, and encourage her to indulge.
Here are some points that will help unlock your spouse’s inner sexual animal:
– Ask and deliver
The key to a woman having positive associations with a new sexual experiences is making her feel safe and valued. Take it upon yourself to test something out without understanding her feelings about it first, and she won’t feel either. She’ll feel like she’s been violated and disrespected, and it won’t bode well for your future sexual endeavors.
If you want to do something you haven’t done before, always talk about it before you try it. It doesn’t have to be a board meeting. You can tell her about that crazy move you’d like to try and tell her how much it would turn you on, and ask if she feels comfortable trying it. Reassure her if she doesn’t like it, you’ll stop, no questions asked. Then, instead of having an angry woman on your hands, she’s open, ready, and willing. Clearly, that makes for a better night.
-Make her feel like the sexiest woman on earth.
Confidence breeds freakiness. If your woman feels irresistible in her skin, and she knows you find every inch of her enticing, she wont hesitate to put herself in less than flattering positions, try weird things, or touch herself in front of you. She’ll have no doubts that you’re enjoying the show.
If you’re the kind of guy who feels uncomfortable giving out compliments, then guy, better start! Don’t assume she knows how sexy you find her ankles, the curve of her hips, her waist, her mouth, blah,blah,blah. Just make sure she knows that! A self-assured woman is the one who will be outgoing and adventurous in bed. And while much of that confidence should channeled to her, if she’s lacking, you should be committed to showing her just how stunning you find her, flaws and all.
-Get her horny
Get her to the point of no return and make your suggestions then. Take it to the next level when she’s physically and mentally drunk in lust, and she’ll be more open-minded and in the moment. It will just add to the already amazing sex you’re having, and more than likely, make it even sweeter.
The benefits of this are two-sided. The positive sexual experience you shared, aside from being great in itself, will also pave the road for future freaky exploits. The next time you suggest something wild, she’ll have a willing response to stepping out of her comfort zone. She’ll immediately become excited remembering that time she allowed herself to be talked into something new, and how much she enjoyed it. Who in their right mind would say no to round two if round one was mind-blowing? That’s right—nobody.
-Encourage her enthusiasm.
Always remember,if you want a woman totally free, then you should always encourage her kinky side rather than attempting to guilt her into it. Yes, telling her about your supafreak ex-girl, and comparing her unfavorably is guilting her into it. As is when she says no, or telling her how boring she is in bed, or likening sex with her to humping a corpse. These are fighting words that will make her feel pressured and self-conscious, and they won’t work in your favor.
Instead, reassure her. If she gets slightly freakier than usual one night, confess that you enjoyed the sex even more than usual. Tell her you find her most attractive when she frees her mind, and she’ll be more likely to keep bringing her freak-game to the table.
The more you encourage her creativity, the more passionate she’ll become about sex. Not just having it, but experimenting with it, making it fun, exciting and unpredictable.
-Buy her a toy.
Presents are nice. Sex toys as presents are even better. Just because she hasn’t taken the initiative to pick up from a sex shop, doesn’t mean she wouldn’t enjoy a toy or two. Start small (say, a vibrator) and be sure you emphasize that the focus is on her pleasure. If she likes it (and chances are, she will), you can gradually introduce freakier stuff. Work up to the point where the two of you go together and pick out something new. Toys are great for discovering her hidden erogenous zones, great for bonding. It’s a win-win scenario.
-What’s her fantasy?
We can tell you right now that you will never find her inner-freak by trying to fulfill your own fantasies. The express route is figuring out hers.
Start by having an honest conversation about what turns her on. What does she think about when she’s alone in bed? Are there any things that turn her on that she’s never shared? Reassure her nothing is off-limits, and that nothing will offend you or disgust you. Treat her every admission seriously, and make it a point to make things happen, rather than going at it the other way around and trying to meet your own needs first. Which brings us to our next point…
-Don’t be stingy.
Focus on her pleasure rather than yours and she will never compare you to anyone. You will be the king of her p***y.
Make sure she’s orgasming and enjoying herself, every time. Be devoted to discovering her every erogenous zone. Find things that turn her on she didn’t realize existed. So when you suggest something new, she’ll know it’s not for selfish reasons, but because you truly think she’ll enjoy it. Begging for it sef.
Sometimes women get so caught up in their partner’s pleasure that it can feel like sex, and even climaxing, is a show. True or false? Reassure her that being freaky is not that exaggerated bad acting found in the porn you both watch.No.
It’s not a performance. It’s about figuring out what truly gets you going, and being fully, passionately committed to the experience. It’s about giving in to real pleasure.
We’ve been focusing on her so much, but the truth is, you have a lot to learn yourself. You have secret spots and fantasies, too. The key to each of you finding fulfillment is figuring out what works together. Don’t just expect her to be open-minded; you have to take risks together.
Doing something neither of you have done before makes it a bonding experience. Yes, It could go terribly wrong, result in scratches, or turn out to be not as adventurous, but you did it together. You can laugh it off together.
-Establish a strong sense of trust.
Having freaky sex is largely dependent on trust. She needs to be completely sure that if she makes a weird sound, or laughs because she’s nervous, or gets turned on by something completely bizarre, you won’t judge. Nothing could possibly weird you out or turn you off. You’ll be loving, accepting and happy to have the experience together, regardless of whether she orgasms or not.
At the end of the day, if a woman is mentally and emotionally engaged, she can be sexually engaged on almost any level. If you want her open, ready and willing, you need to start at her brain, hit her heart, and slowly work your way down. Establish trust, and her freaky side will follow.