Important Things To Look Out For When You Meet Your Girlfriend’s Family For The First Time
Taking the decision to meet the parents and siblings of the person you’re dating is a tough one. Few things are as intimidating as meeting her parents, especially when you want to impress her family which will most likely make you pay more attention to yourself than the dynamics that may be playing right before you.
It is important that you pay attention to some subtle details such as the way your partner interacts with her family and the way her family interacts with you. Tiny observable details can provide you with clues regarding what to expect if you intend to spend a lifetime with her.
The family relationship dynamics of your partner can either impact negatively or positively in your future as a couple. Moreover, if you’re able to pay attention to tiny details, you can be able to detect major and minor red flags that you should be aware of.
Any Form Of Yelling
One thing about human nature is that most of the habits we have, we pick come from our families and friends. We tend to adopt similar ways of communication, expression of anger and response to conflict from our families. If you have a girlfriend that grew up in a family where they passed messages across by yelling, there’s a chance she will adopt the same mechanism of communication.
If you find out that your partner yells as a means of communicating, it is important you tell her that you both should find a different means of resolving conflicts and tell her your preferred means of communicating about issues.
You Always Feel Uncomfortable With Them
While this is a subtle one, it is nonetheless important. Try the best you can to pay attention to the way you react to your partner’s parents, siblings and the relationship between them. Having a lingering feeling of unease and discomfort could be an indication of underlying trouble. Try to identify the problem by paying attention to why you’re uncomfortable with them.
While a lot of people come from dysfunctional families and there’s always no clear indication that your girlfriend will turn out bad or will be a terrible partner for simply coming from such a family, it’s always good to be in the lookout.
Unhealthy family relationships don’t usually transcend into romantic relationships as a lot of people avoid succumbing to unhealthy patterns in their romantic interests. Notwithstanding, you should talk about the things you notice, especially if they make you feel uncomfortable.
No Obvious Existing Boundaries
It may be that your partner always her personal space invaded by her family or she always wants to spend her time with them, whatever the case may be, not having set boundaries can cause problems the minute things start to get serious between the both of you.
Having one or both of the scenarios above may mean that her family will be involved in the decision making process of the both of you as a couple. While it is not an entirely a bad thing, it’s always good to have certain things remain between you and your partner.
They Tell Mean Jokes
If you find your partners family telling jokes, especially harsh ones, it may be an indication of an unhealthy means of communication. What you should however be on the lookout for is if her family members are firing insults at one another repeatedly.
For instance, if one of your girlfriend’s siblings makes a joke about how much she has gained weight in front of you, it’s not a cause for concern except they repeatedly bring it up and get other family members into the joke. If a scenario like this comes up, ask your partner what she felt about the “jokes” and follow her lead from there to express yourself.
If the dialogues you have with your partner are productive and positive, then there is very little chance that the little things you noticed can affect your relationship negatively.
Sources: Manswersonline.com
